My current afflictions include a severe case of insomnia, as well as acute senioritis.  These do not make a very good pair.  Add to that the fact that I need to do multiple booktalks … and that I need to give a presentation practically every single week for the next few months … I am passing out at the thought.  I don’t care how many times I do it; speaking in public always makes me hyperventilate.  Not kidding.

One of the fish I bought yesterday is pretty much dead — shockingly, not a pleco — but I feel bad taking it out, because it’s not actually dead.  And it isn’t even my fault this time, because I tested the water, and everything is fine.  (Doing a daily water change will make that happen, I guess.)  I prefer Petco fish only because they have a thirty-day return policy on deceased aquatic life (oxymoron much?!) — for good reason!!!

Brief interlude:

Horrible picture.  But that’s a “toasted” whole wheat hamburger bun, Maranatha sunflower seed butter, and banana slices.  I toasted the bun because I wanted to make French toast out of it, and it wasn’t even remotely stale.  I didn’t mean to toast it, but I put it in the oven and forgot about it.  I know it doesn’t look like French toast, but I actually did dredge it in a mixture of soy milk, egg white and banana extract.  Apparently it was too fat to cook like that.  Oh, well.  It tasted fine, anyway.  😉

The good news of the day is that I do not have a cavity like I thought.  My dentist told me that it’s impossible for me to have any sensitivity to hot or cold in that tooth anyway, so I guess I’m just nuts.  He said I should try a certain toothpaste and see if that helps.  I went to buy it, and I encountered another genius employee… I paid with a ten dollar bill, but it was printed in 1950, which means it looks slightly different from one that was printed recently.  She decided it was counterfeit, and even when she called her manager and the manager told her it was fine, she was skeptical — “I’ve never seen anything like this before!”  Really??  Did you not handle money before the new bills were printed?!

And I encountered another brilliant individual today — I’m on a roll!  My mom came to take me to lunch again.  Because I am a crazy person, I called my nutritionist and told her to tell me that I needed to not get non-fat dressing.  (Yes, I have issues, okay?!)

romaine, broccoli, (mealy) cucumbers, peppers, green beans, mushrooms, ginger-grilled tofu, croutons, LOW FAT raspberry vinaigrette

I wanted roasted pepper vinaigrette.  Of course they didn’t have any.  And, nasty weather notwithstanding, frozen yogurt was a must.  Except that the machine wasn’t turned on, so we had to wait.  And while doing that, I watched as the carton of frozen yogurt mix / starter / whatever-it’s-called was poured into the machine.  In front of the sign that reads, “Fat free frozen yogurt.”  From a container labelled “low fat frozen yogurt.”  It’s not that I feel like I’m going to explode because I ate low fat frozen yogurt instead of fat free; I just feel kind of… deceived, I guess. 

When I told them that it wasn’t true that the frozen yogurt was fat free, they just couldn’t understand why.  “That’s what the sign says!”  I know it does — that’s the problem!!

Also a problem is the fact that I received three mini Larabars as free samples in Whole Foods last week.  Well, that’s not the problem per se; the problem is that one of them was coconut (I hate coconut, so I gave it to my dad); I kept the cherry; and I mourned over the fact that I could not have this one.

I gave it to my co-worker.  With strict instructions that he is not to eat it until I bring him a Mebar so that he can compare the two for me.  😉

In case you were in doubt as to my lack of sanity, observe today’s weather:

Bad picture, but you get the idea.  Nasty, cold, rainy.  So I did what any truly sane person does, and wore flip-flops.

Ouch.  I hate flip-flops; I do not understand how anyone finds them comfortable!  And I totally need to disinfect my feet.  And I am also rocking the oh-so-classy sock tan.  I have no shame, I tell you.

Remember the dress saga?  Well, since I have so many nephews that I can’t even keep track of them… as it turns out, I have two nephews with upcoming bar mitzvahs.  I refuse to wear the same dress to two bar mitzvahs in a row, because I’m a brat like that, so off I went in search of something else.

Keep in mind that I am going to have to tear apart any dress I get, since my height exceeds four feet and these are all too short.  And I need sleeves.  So I don’t bother looking at sizes; the bigger, the better, because it gives me more to work with.  Ergo, none of the dresses in these pictures actually fit, but it’s just to give you a general idea!

this is cream-colored; the embellishments are gold. I think it's a little too... virginal for me.

black and silver. love this one, but I have SO many black dresses, and it's very, very similar to the yellow dress I posted last time.

don't really like this one, and if I did get it, I'd remove the bow. SO not me. I just want a brown dress because I have a killer pair of brown heels that I've never worn since I have nothing that goes with them!

...and that's why I love this. it's brown! the dots are fuschia -- generally a color I avoid, since it makes me look like a cadaver, but in such a small amount it should be fine. except that this is way too short.

I don’t think any of these are going to work, actually.  But if you happen to be a dress alteration genius, your suggestions are more than welcome!!  😉

Tomorrow, I believe, I will suffer the agony of wellies… instead of flip-flops.  This is why sunny days > rainy days!

And now I am going to shut up, because I think I stopped making sense within the first three lines of this post.  Have a great Tuesday!

“Somehow our devils are never quite what we expect when we meet them face to face.” 
~Nelson DeMille


7 responses to “Afflictions

  1. I love the dress with fuschia dots! I have the same problem with dresses. Most of the time regular dresses are more like shirts on me 😦

    I don’t know any lengthening techniques. Maybe if you found some kind of satin material simalar to the one that’s on the bottom, but made that band thicker? It would also help to balance out the middle part of the dress.

  2. I think all of the dresses suit you, but particularly the white one…even though you weren’t a fan 😉 It’s ironic that you hated the bow on the brown dress because I thought it was a rather stunning addition. Just shows how little sense of style I have!

    I have presentations coming out of my ears too…we can hyperventilate together (okay, that sounded really wrong…) Try to keep calm: you have more than enough ability to kick any presentation’s butt.



  3. Ooh, the black dress is particularly lovely 🙂 I remember really enjoying your last dress-altering post! I hope you find something soon.

    Wellies rock. I need some, I hate having wet feet.

  4. I actually like the “virginal” one. I’ll be blunt and honest, the one with that bow is borderline hideous. sorry….just being honest.
    Dont fret about the dressing. I know, easier said than done, but fat free dressing is unsatisfying and usually kinda icky.
    And wellies rock, we feet are my pet peeve.

  5. I went through a period where I was having major tooth pain that 3 different dentists claimed they couldn’t a) detect a reason for or b) do anything about, and in one case the dentist’s assistant actually accused me of just wanting a prescription for painkillers. Outrage! I’m really sorry you’re dealing with that, and hope that you find some sort of relief for the discomfort soon. I don’t know if you drink much soda, but cutting out carbonation helped me quite a bit.

  6. Oh and by the way I like the second dress best, and the white one would be my next favorite. All very nice though! =)

  7. Pingback: Loss For Words |

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