Happy Summer

Happy Summer!  It certainly felt like summer today… and I loved it.  Well, when I was outside, anyway.  The whole “shivering-in-subarctic-air-conditioned-places” thing, not so much.

The girl who was supposed to open the gym never showed up this morning.  I mean, maybe she did, but I left at 7.15, so I wouldn’t know about that.  I hiked 1.65 miles down- and cross-town to get to the other gym.  I don’t mind walking, but I get very frustrated when people are so … irresponsible.  There were at least half a dozen people waiting, and none of us get paid to be there!

Romaine, fetus carrots, tofu, zucchini.  I am now officially out of tofu.  Must re-stock.

Tried the pomegranate chip coconut milk ice cream:

I felt like I was chewing on foil.  This is actually not the fault of the ice cream, since I felt that way beforehand, but I just thought I should mention that.  😉  This flavor tasted very similar to the Purely Decadent pomegranate chip … or maybe it’s the cherry nirvana?  The point is, I couldn’t taste the coconut at first, and while I thought that kind of odd, I was happy about it.  Turns out that if you have a spoonful of just the ice cream — no chocolate or pomegranate — then it definitely does taste like coconut.  I didn’t like that.  But, um, hello — coconut milk ice cream??  To be expected.

This has become a total standby lately… I think I’ve had some variation of it three times in the past week.

Spaghetti squash, sauteed eggplant, chopped Gimme Lean Beef.  Whatever.  I like it, and I can’t be bothered.

Tonight was my last time seeing my nutritionist before she goes away for the summer.  I’ve gotten sufficiently plumped up so that we can do phone sessions (I am not even going to get into how I feel about that… who cares?!), but I’ll get weighed at my crazy doctor’s office.  Which means I have to go there tomorrow, because she’s convinced that his scale isn’t calibrated correctly — this is probably true — and she wants to know how it compares to hers.  Like there is nothing I’d rather do…

Which actually brings to mind something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately, but it’s too long to get into now.  In a nutshell, I’m really depressing myself over my lack of awareness of my purpose, for lack of a better word.  I do believe that everyone has one, but I’ll be damned if I know what mine is… I can’t think of a single person whose life would be different in any way were I not on this planet.  To clarify: I don’t mean if I dropped dead, because if it really mattered to nobody if I did, maybe I should just jump off the roof right now!  I mean if I had never existed in the first place, there is not one person who would be significantly different, either for better or for worse.  And that is, well, depressing.  On that note, I will stop “talking” now before I find myself awake and still rambling about this at midnight!

Have a great Tuesday.

“The purpose of life is a life of purpose.”
~Robert Byrne

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6 responses to “Happy Summer

  1. weirdly i felt the same way today. like ijust wanted to drop dead! and no one would care. =(

    but i care about you and who would i ask about crosswords?!!!?! and btw i’m wearing your bracelet when i debut the LBD.

    and nothing’s wrong with eating the same stuff! i do it all the time! =D

    happy summer! the sun came out…at 3 pm!!!

  2. I think most of us don’t affect people in the manner you are mentioning. Most of us could disappear and not much would change. I think we are just supposed to find the most happiness for ourselves in our lives. That is my silly view.

  3. ~Jessica Zara~

    This post makes me think of ‘It’s a Wonderful Life.’ Although I’m too cynical to believe the message it tries to convey, I’m sure life would be very dfferent if you weren’t here. No-one would understand the term ‘zygote carrots’ for one thing 😉

    I feel like a pretty pointless waste of space most of the time…and always have to have a ‘point’ to doing something, which when you’re naturally apathetic about most things tends to result in major non-productivity.

    Sorry the gym woes are still continuing: one wonders why they bother listing an early opening time at all…perhaps it should just say ‘whenever our employees feel like it.’

    ~Jess~
    xxxxx

  4. Your food looks delicious! Sorry about the gym, that would have pissed me right off!

    I am so upset to hear that you feel that way. As someone who has suffered from depression before, I can sympathize. Your purpose will come, you know that, right? It will. Everyone has a purpose. Sometimes we just have to be patient and wait for it to come to us. I hope you don’t feel too down right now, it worries me to hear you talk like that!

  5. i wouldn’t get too caught up in the whole “purpose” thing. the way i see it, your purpose will come to you. if you go out in search of a purpose, you won’t find it. try to just live life and have fun :] you will find it someday.
    your eats look awesomeee btw.
    xx

  6. I can very much relate to the whole feeling purposeless thing… I felt that way for pretty much my whole life up to this point. Didn’t know what I wanted to do. Didn’t know where I was going… It’s only recently that I discovered my passion for health and nutrition, and deciding to pursue a degree in that area has made me feel more alive.

    Like kilax said, I’m not sure we’re meant to affect the world on some grand scale, since we’re only such a small part of it, but we do affect it in some way, and the best way we can make a difference is to find what we love and pursue that.

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