Happy Earth Day! Okay, so that was really corny, I know. But it’s something I used to say all the time. When I was just plain old weird, instead of supremely mentally unhinged. I haven’t actually said that in years, and I have no idea why it just popped into my head. Moving on.
Thanks for all of the good wishes re: my blood test… I’m not too worried about it, since nothing is ever really abnormal. Well, besides for me, that is! It’s basically just to determine whether my dosage needs to be adjusted… but I won’t have the results until sometime next week, probably Tuesday. What I am stressing over: the Provera issue. It’s just not something I want to get into again, you know? Sigh.
Is it just me, or is that lid pasted on backwards?… I’ve been wanting to try this cereal for a while, but I was afraid to buy an entire box. I hate getting stuck with a whole mountain of something I don’t necessarily like. And it’s a “high-calorie cereal,” which just makes it worse. Anyway, I vastly overpaid for this cup, but I’m glad that I did, because as it turns out, I’m not too wild about the cereal. I didn’t hate it — I’d eat it if I had no other options — but it was too cloying and sweet for my taste.
This afternoon, I had a fight with a sandwich.
PB&J on Ezekiel bread. I suppose I won, since I’m still here, and it is not. Um, I’d rather not think about where it is right now! But I would like to know just exactly how many times I am supposed to eat a stupid sandwich before they stop frightening me!!
I must be somewhat mentally deficient, because I never noticed this before:
It’s not a good picture so you can’t really tell, but it’s a fountain. Water? Always makes me happy! (Though I actually do think that these public displays are completely unnecessary and a total waste of water, but whatever. It’s pretty.)
So today I realized something that is so obvious, it’s embarrassing that I was never able to put it into words before: I don’t like asking for things… because I’m afraid / convinced that I’m not going to get it. I can tell someone I want a million dollars, because I know that’s never going to happen, but if someone asks me what I want, realistically? Whole ‘nother story. I would not be able to answer that question, because I just don’t know. And it isn’t only an issue when it comes to tangible things; it’s probably even more relevant in terms of emotional things. I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate asking for support, because it makes me feel pesky and annoying and, well, needy. Big surprise for someone who prefers to deny the human need for sustenance, but I am absolutely repulsed by the thought of coming across that way. This only applies to me, of course. Naturally. It’s fine for other people to need one another, but me? No, I’m special. In the mustn’t-be-a-pain-in-the-ass-and-inflict-yourself-in-all-your-craziness-on-others way. I’ve mentioned several times in the past that I feel weird saying that I don’t have much real-life support, because I don’t even know what it is; but that’s probably irrelevant, since even if I did know exactly what it meant and how to get it, I wouldn’t do it. Fear of failure, I guess. Or some variation thereof.
I’ve seen this on Caitlin’s blog several times, and I just happened to have sweet potatoes and a can of vegetarian baked beans, so I figured I’d give it a go…
It was actually quite good! I’d prefer making my own baked beans (as opposed to opening a can), so I looked at the ingredients to see what type of beans they were… and it said prepared beans. Ah. Now that certainly clears it up! Anyone have a clue about this??
Just because it’s been quite a long while… “the kids” say hello!
I should really get back to work here. But I think I will probably end up wasting some time and then going to sleep instead. Sounds so much more appealing!
The weekend is nearly here… and I? Am a little bit anxious about it. Okay, more than a little bit. But never mind.
Have a great Friday.
“When we are no longer able to change a situation — we are challenged to change ourselves.”
~Viktor E. Frankl