Part One

How about I skip over the lurid details, because it’s all in the past and there’s no sense in ruminating over things that have already happened?  Instead, I offer you the bullet-point version of the past few days, during which I was ironically, but effectively, made to feel both elephantine and diminutive.

  • Both the first and second seder began after 9.30 PM.  And lasted roughly four hours.  Do the math.
  • Any plans of escaping for a simple walk outside were scrapped due to the relentless rain.
  • My mom totally blew up at me on Tuesday (I think it was because I didn’t want to eat chicken) and informed me that I belong in a hospital, and that after Pesach that is exactly where I am going to go.
  • Coincidentally, not that they’ve noticed, or anything, but I am not actually speaking with my parents at the moment, because my dad did something last night that really hurt my oh-so-tender feelings, and he will never admit that he might be even halfway wrong, so a rational discussion on the topic is out of the question.

I’m done whining.  I just have to keep reminding myself that in a week from today, it will all be over.

Actually, in a week from today, I have class.  My professor finally decided to answer my e-mail … but in his typical helpful fashion, his “advice” was to “look it up in X book.”  Why, thank you.  Now I know exactly what I’m supposed to do.  I mean, really.  Is this why I pay these obscene tuition rates?!

My apologies for the lack of visual stimulation in this post; I obviously could not use my camera over the past few days.  Not that there was anything very exciting to photograph; if you’ve seen one matzah, you’ve seen them all.  And there really isn’t much of a variety from which to choose; unless you’re strictly a meat-and-potatoes person, which I am not, finding something you actually want to eat is rather difficult during this holiday.  I don’t even need to say that this is a source of enormous joy to an eating disorder… wheeee!  Restriction by default!  It’s too confusing for me to sort out how I actually feel about all this… but somehow, I think that the outcome can’t be very good at all.

Additional apologies for my absence in commenting; I think my Google Reader is in the triple digits, which is nearly enough to give me a panic attack, but I do hope to catch up with everyone!!

Have a lovely Thursday… tomorrow is Thursday, right?!… these holidays confuse me so much when it comes to keeping track of the days of the week.

“I’m not confused.  I’m just well mixed.”
~Robert Frost


7 responses to “Part One

  1. So very sorry for the family drama that has ensued. I hope things resolve for your sake, asap 🙂

  2. I haven’t commented in a long while, but I have been following along with you.
    I just felt the need to reach out – I have a very limited knowledge on this holiday in your religion, but I have gathered that the cutting out of certain foods would have a profound effect on you. It isn’t fair, and isn’t right, but you know that there is only a week of it – hold onto YOUR thoughts and as much as you can, concentrate on YOU.
    It’s a time for ‘togetherness’ as a family. To be a part of a family you have to be a part of yourself. Hold yourself together, first and foremost, and with time and patience things will end up falling into place, or at least TRYing.

    Parents are parents, they’ll do things so completely wrong and think they’re so completely right. You’re your own person, and you matter most.

    You’re in my thoughts.


  3. I can only imagine how difficult this must be for you, hun, and I’m sorry you have to go through it 😦 Especially when it comes with drama from the family. Try and hang in there and it’ll be over soon. ❤

  4. Sorry about all the drama, L. And the Google Reader? “Mark All As Read” and give yourself a break 🙂

  5. I agree with the other Katie, “mark all as read” is a stressed out blogger’s best friend 😉
    Just wanted to say that I’m thinking of you!

  6. Amen to Robert Frost.

    I hope all of the drama has died down at least a little for you…the strain of this holiday sounds unbearable and being stuck indoors due to the rain must only increase the hothouse atmosphere that’s going on.

    Keep counting down the days if that helps get you through, and don’t worry about reading/commenting. Just focus on your own wellbeing.



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