My great aunt passed away today. I’m really glad now that I went with my dad to see her on Purim. She was 101, so it’s not like she died young, but I still feel like I’m “supposed” to be sobbing over this, and that the fact that I am not means I am a cold unfeeling person. Cold, yes, maybe… but it’s not that I don’t care.
I woke up at 3.40 this morning. I was not pleased. I went back to sleep around 4.00 for a little bit, but … I’m surprised I’m not more exhausted. It will catch up to me, I’m sure. When I came downstairs, around 5.30, I thought I heard someone knocking on the front door. Since nobody comes around visiting at that hour of the morning, I figured I was imagining things, and went into the kitchen. And then the doorbell rang. Seriously — who rings someone’s doorbell at 5.30 AM?! I went and peeked out the window, and saw a man walking down the steps. Fine, he left, whatever. Then, right before I left the house, I opened the door to check out the weather to see what kind of jacket I needed to take… and found a pile of boxes, addressed to my brother, that had been left on the porch. So I had to drag them all inside. Lovely!
The sun rising! The sun.
This is the lunch I originally intended to take to work on Tuesday, but because my friend re-scheduled (and showed up ten minutes late), I took it today.
I actually made a sandwich … voluntarily. (Okay, I had to use up some ingredients, but still.) Whole wheat mini pita (which apparently turned into a makeshift “sandwich thin” … this is a lovely discovery) with spinach, bologna protein slices, and mustard. Even though I am still wary of sandwiches, I have to admit that this was good. And since I need a mountain of veggies of least once a day, some steamed broccoli and zygote carrots, with some more spinach hiding underneath.
I left work early today, as if I were going to class, but went home instead. Because I had more time than I usually do, I decided to make something that had randomly popped into my head the other day. The plan was to get it in the oven and then do some schoolwork. I tried the “recipe” three times, and it did not work out quite as I had planned. In fact, I ditched it all, and then I was so disgusted with myself for wasting all that money that I just gave up and reverted to one of my old standbys.
You know the drill… spaghetti squash, sauteed eggplant, “meatballs.” This wasn’t quite what I wanted, I don’t think, but we’re kind of low on provisions (especially in the frozen vegetable department!) due to the upcoming holiday, so I had to make do. I wasn’t happy about it. It isn’t because of this in particular, but I’m experiencing a general feeling of discomfiture about everything, and it’s driving me crazy.
After the experiment turned debacle, I didn’t really have much time left for schoolwork! Once again, I couldn’t be bothered to read the assigned articles … so I didn’t. That I can manage to comment on articles I haven’t actually read, and that I can get by with little trouble while doing this proves the point that I don’t really need to actually sit in a classroom, and it makes me feel even more pissed off than ever that I can’t take online classes in the summer. I hate.
The earrings I bought yesterday (that didn’t take long, did it?!):
I could have been skydiving today, which is annoying. Instead I was at work. I really need a vacation. See, I have one co-worker whose work I am supposed to check after he’s done it, and because he is male and therefore cannot multitask, the fact that he is on Twitter all freaking day means that everything he does is rife with mistakes. Mr. J tells me, “That’s what you’re paid for… it’s quality control,” when I express frustration at having to fix all of this co-worker’s mistakes. Look, it’s not rocket science. He’s been working here for over a year, he should have it down pat by now! Mr. J checks my work, and he has never, not even once, brought me something to correct. Because this particular task is so mindless, you don’t actually need a brain to do it!! Am I so wrong to be annoyed??
The mindless parts of my job are a minefield for me, actually. Some days just d-r-a-g on until I feel like I’d rather be peeling back my fingernails. This is a problem. Then again, life is one big problem I have yet to solve, so it’s fitting.
Have a great Thursday.
“It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.”