It’s Friday

Lots of pictures, not much talking? Yes. (To start, anyway!)

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I was actually going to return this when I first bought it… because I thought it flared out too much (you can’t tell in this picture, but it does)… but I’m a little glad I didn’t because it is so comfortable. (It also looks a lot better without the white shirt, but I have no choice.)

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My plum theory turns out to be correct: “red plums” have yellow flesh, and “black plums” have red flesh. I guess I don’t like red plums, then.

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Usual Hugh Jass. Explanation needed? I don’t think so.

My microwave has been busy …

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All Whites and salsa… Egg in a Mug!

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Chocolate swirl pancakes … conceived in my brain, made in the microwave.

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Zensoy organic banana soy pudding with sugar-free chocolate chips… last time I didn’t melt the chocolate chips in the microwave first.  This time I did… but as soon as I put them in the pudding, they hardened again.  I think I’m going to give up on the chocolate-chips-in-banana-pudding thing.

Just for creepiness factor here… (amputation tools, 1775)

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Some words… minor verbal vomit. Verbal dribble, I guess. Or verbal spit-up, maybe? Appetizing …

I saw my therapist yesterday. She’s on a Chemical Crusade again, being a pill-pusher. Look, I don’t want to take medication. It isn’t that I’m opposed to the idea of it in general; I’m opposed to the idea of it with respect to me. I have tried it in the past, and that didn’t work out too well, seeing how I ended up IP… an experience I don’t care to repeat, thank you very much! And besides, Happy Pills won’t take away the sense of “betrayal,” which is what got me feeling so depressed this time around anyway. She wanted to know if she should be worried about me. Um… what do you think I’m going to do, jump out the plane window?!  I just don’t know what to do… and not that this is really related to that, but I think that maybe part of the reason why I am so tired is because I expend so much energy pretending all the time.  Oh yes, everything is fine and dandy, life is just peachy, sure, I’m okay okay okay okay!!  I guess I even feel like I do that a little bit with my therapist — not because I’m trying to be dishonest or misleading, but I hate it when people get all “Do I need to worry?” on me, when they don’t; and yeah, I don’t want to have this medication issue thrown at me all the time.

Having determined that my blood test results are probably not very reliable, I decided I need to take another one. Except that I don’t really want to go to my doctor and tell him that I think he’s an idiot and so I want to do it again… I guess an appointment with my endocrinologist is in order. When I’m going to find time for this, I don’t know, but I guess I’ll have to manage it somehow… Another pearl of wisdom from my doctor was that maybe I’m tired because my blood sugar is low.  (Two digits below average.  I don’t think that’s enough to make me feel like I’ve been run over by a truck!)  His solution?  “Eat a jelly doughnut!”  Are you STUPID??  That will just make me crash an hour later!!  (Totally ignoring the fact that I’ve never liked jelly doughnuts, and even if I did, I doubt I’d be eating them any time soon.)  He gave me a “prescription” for homeopathic remedies that are used for CFS.  Homeopathy hasn’t really worked for me in the past — I did take arnica when I had my wisdom tooth extracted, but I wouldn’t know if it helped or not!  But I think I might give this a shot anyway, because I am so sick and tired of being so tired.

One of my friends threw a birthday party last night, together with another friend of hers (whom I don’t know) … she invited a whole slew of interesting people, and even though I think I am kind of hermetic by nature and not at all a “partier,” it would have been good for me to go, because I really do tend to isolate too much.  But.  It was an hour away, and she specifically stated that it was set for “9.00 PM to 4.00 AM.”  Who does that on a weeknight?!  Like an old lady, I went to sleep at 10.30 last night, and I’m still exhausted.  As I was making a valiant effort to keep my eyes open at work today, a most unwelcome surprise walked through the door… J is back!!  Do I even need to mention that this did not make me happy?! 

Pre-vacation jitters are setting in… I’ve mentioned this before: I hate packing! And here I am having to do it yet again… whee. I’m leaving on Sunday, and I haven’t decided yet whether I’m taking a laptop with me. Given my pathetic internet addiction, plus the anxiety that builds up when I think of the accumulation of e-mails that will await me when I get back (not even going to mention Google Reader!), I probably will take it along. I’m sure you’re all thrilled to bits about that! ;p

Have a great weekend!

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6 responses to “It’s Friday

  1. Holy cow that pancake is freakishly amazing!
    And yes, you BETTER take that laptop with you! What will I do without my daily dose of the dear XXXx (Since I can’t broadcast your name…)

  2. OK, how did you make that pancake? I am intrigued! I’ve never made pancakes in the microwave before – even my attempts at microwaved scrambled eggs usually end up in the bin!
    I’m so pleased to hear that you’re going to make an appointment with an endocrinologist, that sounds like a really good idea. You know I’m hugely sympathetic to the vetoing of medication too – I just don’t understand why, having suffered horrible reactions to the things in the past, the answer of the mental health profession seems to be ‘oh well, try another one and see if it happens again, maybe you’ll get lucky this time’. No thanks! I am sorry that you’re surrounded by…people of questionnable logic. Ahem.
    Lol, I will take your place and do your packing for you. I love packing! Good luck with it 😉

  3. also, I can’t spell questionable at this time of the morning. Oops.

  4. Bah, the medication issue is a hot topic for me…I’ll be brief and keep ranting to a minimum: therapists like to plug medication for people who they can’t ‘fix’, people who defy the ‘cures’ of general talking therapies and whose problems don’t magically disappear with the magic fairy dust powder that we all know those superhuman people in the mental health care system possess. There has also been some quite revalatory material released recently to suggest that whacking their patients on medication is beneficial both for therapists and the drug companies, and the two have a symbiotic relationship. You stick to your guns and don’t be beaten into taking anything you don’t want to. Meds don’t solve the underlying problems: they just mask the issues and can become a separate addiction/dependency problem in themselves. Plus, every single one I’ve been put on has either worstened my condition or made me feel like a total zombie.

    Your doctor truly is an idiot…I don’t know how you manage to bite your tongue and not just tell him straight that he’s talking a load of…well, you get the point.

    I’m so happy that my other comment helped you a little and huge thanks for the comments you’ve written me recently : )

    I hope your packing induced malaise subsides soon and you have the wonderful vacation you deserve.

    xoxoxox

  5. the pancakes looks so cool!!!! i like the shirt, does it have a hood? i hate packing too and unpacking.

  6. Those pancakes look fab!!! And I LOVE summer fruit… plums and apricots, especially!

    Bring that laptop, girly!

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